CAN I MAKE A GOOD COUNTRY IN THIS REINCARNATION? -1-

Original story by: StarlessNight

Original publication by: Palo Novel

Fan translation by: Kei034 

-1-

There’s documents and photos on the table in front of me.

They are the evidence of a corruption act, with detailed description of the operations related to, not just millions, but in hundreds-millions worth in transactions. If they were to find their way into public eyes, it will be a major criminal exposition.

I truly wish I could congratulate the taxpaying citizen on this exposed corruption incident. However, the very person whose signature were on these documents is sitting across me on the other side of the table.

Apparently, I am working as a secretary to this corrupted politician in front of me.

I am the conspirator to this whole corruption ordeals.

“Our informer took these from the meeting of opposition parties, they will bring it to the press tomorrow.”

My boss, whose appearance is well kept despite his age fitting the seat as a minister, told me.

“If so, all of our effort will go down the drain.”

I agree. If “all of our effort” means his position as a minister, that is.

I looked the photo of him, the team, and mine hanging on the wall inside the minister office; and let out a sigh.

It has been a decade since our first meeting.

I was just finished my postgrad aboard, unsure if I should pursue a teaching career.

The boss was in his mid-thirties, still dressed in a shirt and jeans with determination in his eyes.

“Don’t you see that this country is in shambling, deserved to be far better?” he asked.

“Everyone knows what must be improved, but why were those capable to do so just keep on grumbling? Don’t you want to use your abilities to make a better country?”

The youth at that time, including me, were waiting for someone to be our beacon of hope. Someone who is determined to make a better country. That is why I decided to take his hand.

It was ten years since.

And here we are.

Physical effort, mental effort, sweats, and tears were put in. Now I am wondering how much did we make this country better?

“What should we do?” He asked me expectantly.

In our years on this political stage, I have several skills up in my sleeves; one of them is coming up with some kind of solutions despite the all the odds.

In this time also.

A plan that will get us out.

But how?

We will put our hand in the mud to live another day, and lives until we have to dirtied our hand again and again until what end?

I am tired.

So, instead of telling him the plan like always; the words that I let out was:

“let’s stop.”

“! Hah?” Mr. minister looked at me dumbfounded.

“Let’s turn ourselves in.”

“What are you saying?” He asked, unable to comprehend my words.

“It is not out of norm to let the bureaucrats have their cut in the ninth digits. Everyone did it. No, we cannot proceed if we do not go with the flow. If we do not make the arrangement, they will not work for us. Do you not understand that we have been minimizing the damage as much as we could? When those opposition parties had the rein, the difference was far more!”

I looked at him silently, trying to find the determined politician I used to know.

“When will it end?” I asked. “We do it. They do it. In the end where is the better country we tried to make will be?”

Mr. minister looked at me for a long while. Then, he let out a sigh.

“I see. You made your decision, didn’t you?”

“I am sorry. It is so.”

My boss let himself sink into the sofa, letting go of the burden he bears, and sigh exhaustedly.

“What a shame.” He murmured. “Do you know why I what you to join the team?”

“…”

“The word is full of dreamers; a first grader could tell what a better country should be…, but very few could make a practical plan to reach such goal.”

He drawn his hand in the air, as if moving a brush.

“You are different. Unlike those raving scholars, though filled with hope and dreams, your eyes gaze unto reality. That is why it surprised me that you would choose the unsubstantial delusion instead of reality.”

“Sorry.”

“I wish I could have the dream to, but in this reality it is different. In the end I will need one last help from you.”

He waved his hand.

The two men standing beside the door behind me reached into their side pocket retrieving the guns.

Black pistol.

I realized his intention.

There must be a letter written by me descripting how I guilty I am for abused the ministerial authorities behind his back which led to my suicide.

Tomorrow, news of my suicide and the evidence of my corrupting operation will be released before the opposition parties.

Mr. minister here will shed his tear in front of the camera.

I will be the one behind everything, driven by guilt, took my own life.

He will be able to keep his popularity.

Our goal will live on.

What I could not yet fathom is; what would the cause of my corrupting act be? Classic gambling debt? Maybe?

“We all must make the decision the will help as many people, do we not? I hate that it comes to this, but it is the only way.”

Mr. Minister looked at me, tear swelling from his reded confused eyes.

I am not sure anymore if these were his true feelings.

I chuckled.

Thinking of when we set off on this path.

Our first step was taken on good intentions; determined.

How did it turn out this way?

Did the evil seeped in?

Did it devour us?

When?

Since when has we been devoured?

From the beginning?

Or long before I took that hand?

Then what is the meaning of all the things we did?

In the end, how much a better country did we make?

None?

While I was losing in my thought, a man held me. The other man put the end of the pistol in my mouth. I heard that it will be less painful this way.

The last condolence from the brother in arms, is it not?

.

What an irony that in this last moment, my mentor words flashed through my mind;
“The light shine into the darkness; thus, the darkness cannot be within the light”

.

A long-forgotten message.

Those thrives in darkness do not deserved the light.

Light can not be made from darkness.

I know that my hands were stained beyond prayer.

The destination is hell.

But at this moment, I want to redo.

If possible, the next time will not be a mistake.